Friday, March 01, 2024

Translations From Recent Things I Have Said In Meetings

"I'm not sure all stakeholders here are fully aligned": Come get this dodo out of this meeting before I reach through Zoom and do violence. 

"There may be additional business implications": I could have told you what a bad idea this was six months ago but here we are.

"I'm concerned that if we can't identify a root cause this will continue to be an issue": Last time you didn't listen and we spent three months managing a comms fire.

"I'm concerned that this may have a serious impact on customer experience": I will be looking at job ads as soon as this call is over.

"I'm not sure this level of effort is sustainable on the contracted timelines": I am looking at job ads RIGHT NOW. 

2 comments:

  1. Oh hey, we speak the same language! Secretly saying (I hate you so much) in my head the whole time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jenny F Scientist7:12 PM

      I swear every time one of the execs opens their mouth I open LinkedIn.

      Delete

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