 |
Figure 1: An accurate summary of my life at home. Featuring a rug, a faded couch, an elaborate train track, and a magnetic-tile edifice with Pokémon figurines inside. Also, many books.
|
There's a delicate balance between work and everything else. I've been pretty good at maintaining it... until school's out. (Usually because it snowed a QUARTER INCH and the roads are A LITTLE WET so everyone must panic. I'm about to write a strongly worded letter to the school board.) Anyhow, my kids have been enjoying building things (see above).
I had a somewhat-related realization today. I expect my children to entertain themselves, for age-appropriate values of this. Sometimes I have to do laundry or grade or whatever, and they can help with the laundry (quite popular!), or I can make cookies with them in ten minutes, but in the meantime they're on their own. Likewise, if they whack a toe on something, I'm willing to comfort them, but I'm NOT willing to listen to twenty minutes of top-volume screeching. I expect them to develop self-soothing skills in an age-appropriate way as well.
I've been realizing that I find other parents who don't do this intolerable, and their children too. Mostly I find it intolerable when I am forced to listen to someone else's child lose their entire mind over a) hearing the word no or b) something that in no way calls for that much screeching and/or parental response. (I am speaking here of a group of neurotypical children who really, really don't need to scream that much over waiting five minutes for a turn...)
I feel ya! Though I also feel sorry for those parents. Especially since their kids generally will behave for me (all that elementary school volunteering I did in high school must have paid off). Mostly though, I'm anti-social and just don't hang around poorly behaved children or their parents anymore! (DC1's best friend is on the spectrum and he is not at all spoiled-- much easier to deal with than neurotypical and spoiled when the parent is around.)
ReplyDeleteWe do have DC2 at spring break camp this week because at age 5 we can't work AND keep her entertained without her bouncing off the walls. We can about handle pick-up to bedtime, but it's pretty exhausting. DC1 (age 11) is currently cleaning his room.
Sadly the mom is a close friend. Maaaaaybe the kids will grow out of it and/or go to school where whining is not rewarded with attention (her older kid did). In the meanwhile I will be super judgy about it.
DeleteI look forward to when my kids will all be in school- they'll be 5, 8, and 11! Big kids are my favorite right now.
Goodness, your children play in a nice tidy fashion! Our floor is currently scattered all over with squigs and bits of lego and pieces of a marble run that fell over. I didn't have the energy to organize a clean-up effort and certainly wasn't going to do it by myself.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with you about the playing. Plus, I think it is good for them to entertain themselves. My son always seems more imaginative when he is playing by himself than playing with us. I love playing with them of course, but I also love that they have learned to leave us in (relative) peace if we are clearly busy (cleaning up the kitchen, etc).
Ah ha ha ha, no, there's a whole 'nother room full of chaos, don't worry. (Also my spouse picks everything up every night.)
DeleteI am perfectly happy to build a track but NOT to zoom trains around it for a whoooooole hour.
Amen to that. I have two of them. They can entertain each other.
ReplyDeleteDH occasionally gets irritated with our children, and then he spends time with literally any other kids and realizes ours are amazing by comparison. Constant nagging: lots of effort in the beginning, but pays off when they're bigger. OTOH, last week C1 cried because the whipped cream fell off his waffle. For the love of God, just put the food in your mouth and you'll feel better, child. They're clearly not perfect.
ReplyDeleteCONSTANT nagging. Mine also cry when they are hungry! JUST EAT.
Delete