Me to Dr. S, a few months ago: "Dear, sometime we should talk about what your parents are going to do when they can't live in that giant house any more... which will be in a few years because of [assorted preventable health issues, history of CANCER!! (it was Stage I, ten year life expectancy is unaffected), and a neurodegenerative condition].
Dr. S, very huffy: "I don't see the point! They won't listen to me anyways and we'll just deal with it when we deal with it and it won't be your problem anyways." [Stomps off.[
Dr. S, this week, after visiting his parents: "Dear, we should talk about what my parents are going to do. My dad had a fall and eventually they won't be able to live in that big house any more."
(Readers, I RESISTED the urge to say I Told You So.)
Husbands! They're like toddlers sometimes. The poor helpless man-creature was probably hungry the last time you brought it up. You showed remarkable restraint with the "I told you so."
ReplyDeleteI'm curious what solution you two came up with. With my father-in-law, I've flatly said, "He's not moving in here."
They could buy a nearby ranch and we could help with shopping/ cooking/ mowing; they could move into the retirement community in the field across the road; MIL could live with SIK who loves her largely from not having to be around her for the last seven years more than two days at a time, and move all over the world! ("Can't I'm in the military"= no excuse.) Under no circumstances will they be living in a house with either of us in it. NOPE.
DeleteI vote retirement community attached to phased care facilities.
DeleteThey have one of those across the street too! All the way up to a rehab facility. Literally across the street. Like 300 feet away.
DeletePerfect!
DeleteThis made me laugh because we just had almost exactly this set of conversations in my house.
ReplyDeleteAwww! I guess the empathetic view is that Dr. S just wasn't emotionally prepared to have this conversation at that time. However, I hope he is on board with the under no circumstances part of the deal, because people who are in denial, er, not emotionally prepared at that time, often get blindsided. The fact that he's ready to discuss it now is certainly a good sign!
ReplyDeleteReaders, I RESISTED the urge to say I Told You So.
ReplyDelete:) You are a saint!