My relative with the bad diagnosis is going to Ye Olde Quack Clinic in three days. They will be charged $4600 per week to be treated with combinations that, if they worked, I assure you every clinic in the world would be using. I expect them to be gone in a year tops, leaving behind a young child and a spouse.
They are being gulled willingly, but there's a special place in hell for the people running this clinic. Shame on those despicable humans for exploiting the desperate with false hope.
We recently took a delightfully relaxing vacation to see family. While there, one of my siblings-in-law received some distressing health news (of the kind with a 50% 5-year survival). They immediately tried to think of just the right combination of "alternative" remedies, quack clinics in Germany, and powdered mushrooms to solve this.
The news is obviously very upsetting. I had also never seen so close up the bargaining with the universe, the magical thinking, that underlies all these unscientific bullshit "cures." And I realized that the fundamental driving force is: If I can just do all the right things, I'll be okay. Bad things won't happen because I can control the randomness with this (herb, gluten-free diet, stem cell transplant in Mexico, by drinking vinegar every day.)
Unfortunately the survival rate of this condition, untreated by modern medicine, is pretty darn close to zero. It's hard to think you might do everything medicine has to offer, and still die. I just don't see how denial is going to make this situation better.
Dear Readers, my work has been more than a little dysfunctional lately. Questionable leadership decisions, iffy financials, a large round of layoffs.... I am extremely torn about whether I should be looking for the exit.
On the one hand, the company is in at least warm water financially and I don't see how the staffing issues will be resolved. The level of uncertainty, verging on chaos, is high, and the department I want to move into probably will not happen for various reasons.
On the other hand, I have a stellar and realistic boss ("Look out for yourself, but know your work is valued and I'd be sad to see you go"), I work with a whole lot of great people, and I have an enormous amount of freedom and responsibility without much stress. I regularly problem-solve interesting things, get drawn into meetings with higher ups, and overall am pretty satisfied. Also I'm well paid and got a 10% raise last year.
SO, do I stick it out, knowing I don't really NEED a job and we could get by on one income, or do I look really seriously at other jobs, or do I apply to stuff but only if it looks really appealing???
MIL: "Oh, don't worry about it, we'll carry the [extremely heavy, requiring two hands] crocks down to the basement."
Me: ".... no please don't."
Me: "You can sign up for a membership to [local nature garden] online, it's super easy."
FIL: "I just don't trust the internet."
Me: "Don't worry, all your financial transactions are processed there anyways!"
MIL & FIL, repeatedly: "There's just nowhere to put this."
Me: "You could get rid of it."
Them: "We just can't bear to let it go. We'll put it in the basement."
Me: "Okay! The garage sale will just be that much bigger when you die."
(I do actually care about them and want them to be okay, but a a certain amount of snark is needed to deal with people who LITERALLY brought almost 30 tables, 45 chairs, and a five-foot-high pile of rugs to a six-room house.)
The in laws are now here. While I recognize they are not at their best after uprooting their whole lives, I'm also a bit surprised at how not-okay they are. They're tired and overwhelmed... and also I filled out a new-patient visit request for them yesterday. They're worn out... and also somewhat unable to prioritize (though that has always been true, it's just worse now).
Anyhow, I'm glad they're here, because it was definitely time. More of the everyday stuff is for sure landing on me, and I am not at all surprised. In some ways I think it's easier for them to ask me for help because I'm not THEIR child.
But it's still a lot.
