1) I can't quite articulate why, but it's like a giant weight has lifted, simply because I have work for which I receive both respect and money. My education is actually useful for something! I can stop worrying that I'll never work again! (I still worry that I may end up adjuncting for almost-forever. Still.)
2) Someone asked if I was planning on going to the local LLL meeting, like, ever. Errrrrrgh. I tried to tactfully explain that, in fact, I had some serious medical problems last time, and treating them led to permanent serious medical problems. And that a doctor/lactation consultant, whose specialty is serious medical problems in breastfeeding, told me that I both could and should stop. Also that I don't want well-meaning people running through "Did you try heat? How about probiotics? Pumping? Fenugreek? ECHINACEA?" I tried all of those for which there was any evidence whatsoever, I ended up really, really sick as a result of not weaning my child, which in retrospect was the correct choice; too late now - and I have NO INTENTION of going through that again. When I say that if I get mastitis even once, I'm done, this is based on years of painful experiences and consultation with three specialist MDs and every piece of scientific literature ever published on the subject. And I don't want to try echinacea/ acupuncture/ traditional Chinese medicine/ homeopathy/ whatever. NO.
(Yes, I get a little annoyed about this one.)
To point (1): Yay! I'm glad that you're feeling relief. Just consider this one step in re-entering the working world. I doubt that you'll let yourself be a forever-adjunct, if you don't want to be one.
ReplyDeleteTo point (2): Ugh. I hate the way militant breast feeders push breast feeding in general. I'd especially hate it if I were you. My feelings on breastfeeding (after making it to ~20 months with Kiddo) is that you've got to do what works for you. Breastfeeding made me a crazy person with all the pumping and supply concerns. And I swear on all that is holy that if this time around just *one* person tells me to just wake up in the middle of the night to pump, I will unleash all my sleep deprived wrath on them. (This was suggested to me umpteen times as a solution to my supply problems. Never mind that Kiddo was waking up every 2-3 hours to nurse and the lack of sleep was making me a zombie/trying to ruin my marriage.)
Oops. Sorry about the rant.
One step! STEP ONE!!
DeleteI don't think these people are militant so much as... well meaning but ill informed. On the subject of supply, my sister was neverevernomatterwhat able to pump enough for her kids and you know what, they got formula while she was at work and they are FINE and there was nothing in the world that was going to solve this problem. I think I tend more towards telling people that I know lots of people including my sister who used formula and it was FINE and if they get to a point where they think nursing is making them crazier than not nursing I think it's totally okay to draw that line and their kids will be FINE.
Okay okay okay, what about the massive joke when they tell you to take a "nursing vacation", and just as you're like, "S*** YEAH", they respond, "So, you know, just don't do anything else but nurse for a whole day." And I'm like, "You think I'm stressed out because I'm a woman and we're all incapable of telling other people 'no'? I'm stressed out because--*clear throat* *straighten collar*--ALL I DO IS NURSE ALL DAY. GOT IT?"
Delete1) Yes to all that. My new half-time Interim position requires all my skills and pays (some) green money, which makes me feel as you said, but is also in shocking contrast to my spouse's position in the same field, which happens to be found next to the word "success" in all aspects in the clergy dictionary.
ReplyDelete2) My three children, I breast-fed them, for 9 months, for 7 months, for 6 days. We live in the 21st century
My spouse's position is also right next to 'success' in 'people who want faculty jobs'. And I'm the professor's wife who adjuncts- but for cash!
DeleteAlso, AMEN.
, which means we have options, for everyone's sake, and that is good news.
ReplyDeleteBut the answer to nursing problems is always MOAR NURSING.
ReplyDeleteI was torn between crying and going on a homicidal rampage in this topic just yesterday, and the offending comments weren't even directed at me. FFS.
So much of I KNOW. I nursed my children for a total of 30 months so far (of their combined 100 months of life)- so seriously, everyone, don't talk to me like I don't know what I'm doing. But if it had been 30 seconds it should still be fine to say I'M DONE NOW. Doctors who are completely ignorant about breastfeeding problems, drug safety, etc. ALSO drive me nuts, but in the other direction... I'm easily annoyed, I guess.
DeleteYeah, I try to be up front with other moms when we're talking about breastfeeding that I stopped breastfeeding my kids when I did because, first and foremost, I effing wanted to. There were reasons why I wanted to, but what's important is that the breastfeeder is the only person really qualified to decide how long they should go, and I think it's weird that other people get so invested in it.
DeleteI'm glad you're feeling better. And I don't really worry about you adjuncting almost-forever, unless you want to.
ReplyDeleteAs for the breastfeeding (and probably many other topics), while I still lack practical experience, it seems that "be informed and trust your own judgement" is as important as talking to professionals that may have some trick (or drug) or another up their sleeve. In the end, it's your body and your life.