I once promised Belle I wouldn't post a birth story (plus, it's pretty boring: I went into labor, eight hours later my kid came out, then there was a lot of lidocaine, the end). But I keep reading Bionic Mama's highly entertaining and only mildly horrifying birth story and remembering bits and pieces. So here's one:
I'm in the giant tub at the birth center. Or maybe I'm leaning on the bed, or in the shower, or hiding in the bathroom; I wasn't exactly present, if you know what I mean. There is a midwife, in her late forties, immensely experienced and a little sarcastic, and a sweet, blonde student midwife. "Is the baby coming soon?" I ask the older midwife.
"No," she says, "it's going to be a little while."
"Can't you just LIE to me?" I say, exasperated.
"No," she says, "I generally make it a practice not to lie to my patients."
"You could make an exception here," I say.
Much later, I ask her again. "Yes," she says, "very soon."
"Well, now I know it's true, if you finally said it."
And WAS it true? Or did it turn out she was a liar after all?
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, it was true!
ReplyDeleteit would be a much better story if it hadn't been. but not such a good time.
ReplyDeletei sort of believe medical professionals should selectively lie, but then i end up assuming they're all lying and being unnecessarily unhappy.