"Shit We Tried That Didn't Work, Sometimes Repeatedly."
-Dr. Jekyll
"Things Do Things To Other Things."
-My dad's version of every slide title
"Things Do Things."
-Our joke about bad seminars
"I Don't Believe It Either, But It Got Me a Nature Paper."
"Spot the Faked Figure!"
"Unpublished Results That Contradict Our Hypothesis."
"Nou Viff Acksents aaand Typografffikal Erorrs."
"Incomprehensible Verbose Pretentious Old Guy Science: Fall Asleep Now."
"Using the Same Obsolete Technique Since 1983!" (corollary)
"Towards a Model of Bad Job Talks: Crystallography Strikes Back."
